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Home > Going over the budget, and not my own,

Going over the budget, and not my own,

April 16th, 2013 at 03:11 pm


Firstly, thanks to those who responded kindly to my previous post (the one where I felt a bit bad about the gift of a frame for Confirmation while my daughter's peers were getting diamond jewelry - earrings and crosses). I am back in the saddle about life being more than trinkets and doo-dads. I know that, but every once in awhile the jealous/envy/desire to keep up with the Joneses sneaks in and catches me off guard. This instance being one of them. And my daughter never uttered anything of discontent about the gifts she received, indicating to me that the problem is clearly MINE and not hers.

I am reminded that we had a great weekend as a family. We hosted the Luncheon on Saturday and enjoyed extended family (grandparents, uncle, my best friend). The weather was lovely on Sunday and we went for a three mile walk in a local forest preserve's river walk type thing. We also played Scrabble with the boys who usually like to play Chess. It was great fun. We also stopped at the library and took out a bunch of books. The oldest is now a Boy Scout and he's looking at some merit badge books to see which he would like to pursue. Outside of the celebration, we spent absolutely nothing. I do need to remind myself that money doesn't buy happiness. And money really doesn't have to do much with creating simple family quality time.

My best friend whom I have maintained a safe amount of distance from for the past several months is back with regularity. It's been recalibrated though to "normal". We'll talk once or twice a week and I finally feel like its a two-way street conversation-wise. She is a never-ending drama of men and money problems. She won't change. The only thing I could do is change the way I'm dealing with her. It has helped that my social circle is slowly expanding to include some new friends whom I've always considered "nice acquaintances" who I'm socializing with (breakfast after Mass, play dates with kids while grown ups visit).

Best friend is meeting with the bankruptcy attorney on Thursday. I said nothing when she said she was going to be late with her mortgage payment so she could pay the attorney the $900 (I'm sharing it here). She is coming over today with her bank statements to determine her spending. And I'm helping her in the sense that I'm showing her what the book DH and I used when we went through our financial seminar a few years ago suggests what % should be spent in each category based on "x" budget. What I spend isn't going to even be discussed. I'm simply sharing with her what we learned in our class. I did give her the "Dave Ramsey Total Money Make-over" book on Saturday at the Confirmation Luncheon. She said she read the first chapter (not that I know what it is about).

So, I am hoping that I can be helpful in a general sense. She wanted to get together before-hand so I think she isn't completely caught off guard by what the attorney suggests should be her spending amounts. She's doing the bankruptcy that has to do with debt restructuring and payment for five-seven years.

It will be interesting.

2 Responses to “Going over the budget, and not my own,”

  1. creditcardfree Says:
    1366127273

    Good luck with your friend today. If my memory serves, the first several chapters of Dave Ramsey are about money myths...discussing payday loans, ect. The last 1/2 to 2/3 of the book is about his baby steps. So if the first chapters annoying her, encourage her to skip those and move to the meat of how to get out of debt.

  2. rob62521 Says:
    1366152898

    Hope things work out well with your friend.

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