another year wiser? Not so sure about that, but making progress anyhow!
My morning began with contact lens drama - not being a wearer, I'm of no support to my older daughter's lens issues. She lost one, found it, put it in and there must have been some debris on it or something, but it ended up being a horrible experience (eye pain, watering, crying, upset, drama, etc). It ended up being the last contact, so we were thankfully able to get to the optometrist for another box of lenses, and get her to school by 2nd period. I was able to make it to school to read to the 2nd graders, my mom took me out to lunch at Egg Harbor. Had lots of well wishes from friends on FB and relatives IRL. Feeling the love, though the party is on Sunday.
I've learned that it is probably best to forgive and move on. Crazy-mother ex-friend is back in my life; she drove my daughter home last night (well out of the way) so she could attend an Open House at the high school. I called her to thank her (because it is the nice thing to do) and we were quite cordial, however I'm careful not to say anything about anyone (she is a gossip monger) and keep it neutral.
I've also learned to let go. My best friend has been incredibly high maintenance for awhile and for a bit I've done the fade just to have lots of breathing room. After all of our years together, I've learned that she is who she is. She'll need to live out the consequences of her decisions. She has seen a Bankruptcy attorney about filing Chapter 13. I didn't even have an opinion to share.
I've learned that for the people who use their money as power, they'll probably end up using it as love, too. I'm emotionally estranged from my biological father and haven't seen him in well over a 18 months. Do I miss him? No. I have a great stepdad who embodies everything that a "father" should be. I've figured out that those with a minimal capacity for love have a minimal capacity. It isn't that I am not unlovable. Totally not my problem. It's not me. Anyhow, my biological father sent me a check for $500 (more than he usually does). I'll mail my thank you card today.
So my hopes and wishes for the next year are that my family continues to value what is important and that as we make some major changes, our happiness and health will continue.
Another year older, and
November 15th, 2012 at 12:52 pm