OK, this is where I play psychoanalysis with myself.
Why does this whole Poconos thing really bother me?
(1) My up-bringing. I was raised by divorced parents. My mother didn't become educated until after my brother and I were grown. She worked minimum waged secretarial jobs. My father came from big-time money but didn't pay child support on a regular basis. We lived in a small apartment and ate mac and cheese while my father lived alone in the big house and drove a Corvette. I think this whole Poconos thing dredges up some unresolved identity issues here.
Who am I, really?
I am a wife and mother. I don't work outside of the home, and I feel it is my job to make sure that I am the best money manager that I can be. I don't feel that I am girlfriend first and need weekly outings to complain about my life (lots of whining when I was at the first and only get together). A friend told me she found this group like a "sorority". I have friends, but I prefer quality time with my own family and family friends. The sad thing is: I really like myself, but feel that if I'm not running with the Poconos crowd, then I'm an outsider. But do I really want to be an insider? Probably not, though the wrapping on the package does look pretty.
I need to remind myself that this is really about me.
Snap out of it, Laur! Time to embrace your inner frugal beautiful self and move on.
Reminder as to who I am
September 21st, 2011 at 09:48 am