I adopted CJ's snapshot of finances - all in one place, all on an Excel spreadsheet. I used to track things all over the place: checking account for EFTs, DH's debit/credit card for 2nd job expenses, cash in the jar for extraneous funds, my Excel spreadsheet for groceries and household stuff. SO TOTALLY CHAOTIC ... talk about self-sabotage and never letting myself win!

It is all there in black and white, though I struggle to deal with variables such as: (1) will the tenant pay her rent on time or late? (2) are the budgeted amounts realistic for out-of-state travel? (3) not on the budge plan for certain utilities (4) Etc.

I did need to readjust my goals for November and had to stretch them out to year end. I thought it best to come up with realistic goals and all extra cash can be thrown onto debt.

By year end:
(1) EF back up to $10K - presently at $9K
so $500 per month for Nov and Dec
(2) Capital One debt paid off, plus double minimum amount payments to Discover and Bank of America
(3) Start and maintain cash hold account (small savings) for rental property repairs and second job expenses

Frustrating to push back dates, but there is Christmas in there (though I have a good grasp on that) however DH has two apartment painting gigs in Nov and Dec, so that income should be more than enough.

I am pleased also to report that I am minding my own money business and not falling into traps of discussing things that aren't pertinent to me. I don't care to know who is spending what dollar amount on what item. This frees me up from becoming bitter or resentful. It has been hard, but I've noticed that with most of my time and energy going into the quality of life I am providing for my husband and children, we are all happier. Less gossip -

AND I have extracted myself from any discussions about an ongoing legal issue in my extended family (DH's relatives retained my lawyer brother for representation).

I stopped looking at the balances of any accounts for retirement and education out there. I will have years to recoup those losses.

There is something satisfying about living in the moment (a careful eye turned to the future) and taking it as it comes.